An orgasm joins you to the past. Its timelessness becomes the brotherhood; the brethren are lovers; the extended 'family'. I share that sexuality. It was then, is now and will be in the future.
Derek Jarman
For me cumming and cum have an important emotional and symbolic relation to SM Play. On one level that's obvious - an orgasm is the natural high point of sex of any kind. But, in a theatre of play like SM where giving and taking, control and abandonment, taboo and transgression, and the reorientation of sensual stimulii are fundamental to a complex piece of fantasy and physical challenge, orgasm and semen have a special place.
The orgasm has replaced the Cross as the focus of longing and the image of fulfillment
Malcolm Muggeridge
In group sex, cumming can be a profound moment, especially if you are sharing that moment with other hot, sexy guys. I've been both TOP and bottom where a cum-pig takes the combined loads of a circle jerk. Seeing guys cum one after another in quick succession, sharing their moment of release ... The smell of man-cum is intense as the cum-pig's body and face become drenched in that precious, masculine juice. I don't play in groups very often, but those times that I have have been memorable!
And what is an orgasm, except laughter of the loins?
Mickey Rooney
SM Play is not about being unhappy - it's about need and fulfillment. Cumming feels great and cum is a uniquely masculine and sensual fluid. SM is a place for pain and challenge, but it also a place for joy.
When you cum you let go. For a moment at least you reveal yourself transparently. The intensity of orgasm takes complete hold. The French call it a "little death". The facial expression is similar to that of pain - intense, extreme, honest. To watch a man cum - and I mean really watch him - is to look briefly inside of him. For me as a TOP, this sharing in (and controlling of) a bottom as he abandons himself to physical sensation is akin to pushing him through his pain theshold - though, of course, much more fun for the bottom! It is the flipside of the SM coin... And, when I cum, when I abandon myself to orgasm and shoot my load over the bottom's face and body, he gets to see me, for a instant, in that same condition: part of the 'brotherhood' that Derek Jarman refers to in the opening quote.
And when a guy cums, he shoots. That load is precious, because, unless he's very lucky in his physiology, he'll not be able to cum again for quite a while. Unlike play with other body fluids such as piss, cum play has the added frisson that it is a (temporarily) 'unrepeatable' gift. In taking my cum, a boy is also demostrating his submission. His body, face and mouth (if he's into this - it is not risk-free) are marked out as my territory as I spray my man-juice onto him and smear it across his body with my fingers, leaving it to cool and stick to his skin, it's smell filling his nostrils.
There is a risk in swallowig cum, and it's not something I demand of a bottom. But the idea of swallowing cum is potent and I enjoy games which suggest this or find safe alternatives. The best of these is forcing a guy to drink his own cum. It's exquisite because it is so perverse (and yet completely safe). Having a handful of your own cum thrust into your mouth can be wild. By the time the sperm drink is forced upon you, it is cold, you have come down from your orgasmic high and the smell of man-cum is strong. I've had guys retch as they force it down (and I've had guys lap it up like a kitten!). I like it when there is a degree of coercion involved, especially when the bottom is securely restrained and unable to resist...
And there are many ways to play with semen on the outside of the body which suggest or imply the ritual of drinking cum. It's a sticky aromatic fluid and, rather than wipe it away with a towel, I like to watch a bottom play with the man-juice - reminding of who exactly is in charge...
In the vanilla world, we usually decide when and where we cum. So taking that control away from a bottom can be a very satifying way in which to remind him of his place. Forced milking is hot and can greatly affect the nature of a scene. Milk a guy early on and his sexual drive is diminished, so that if he is then severely beaten the pain has little 'turn-on' to mask it. Milk a guy after a hard beating when the endorphins are flowing and the adrenalin pumping, and he'll come like a piston engine. Continue to force-jerk him after he's cum and very soon his dick will ache like hell. Not so much pain becoming pleasure, as pleasure slipping back into pain...
Click underlined links (now open)
Other links will be completed later
See the note on safety issues at the foot of this page
Safety Issues
Remember cum is potentially unsafe
Taking cum in the mouth is not risk-free. Remember that tiny cuts or abrasions in your mouth (from brushing your teeth, flossing or just eating potato chips) can greatly increase the risk.
Also be aware that the membranes of your eyes and nose are very absorbent. Getting another guy' s cum in your eye or nose is UNSAFE.
What you decide is best for you is your decision alone. SM is a game of domination and submission, but no-one should ever take a decision for you about opening yourself to risk.... that said, the idea is hot and can be a potent fantasy in play!
